Coming out of the Tarot closet!
"This is stupid."
"They'll judge you."
"They'll think you're crazy."
"They won't like you anymore if you tell them the truth."
These are just a few of the paranoid thoughts I experienced, before hitting 'publish' on my shiny new Facebook page. Before finally, proudly declaring to the world that I LOVE tarot, and I don't want to hide it anymore!
I knew when I thought about starting a blog, that this would be one of the first posts I would write. So many times, I have wanted to talk to people 'in real life' about tarot - about how much I enjoy reading and thinking about the symbolism of the cards. How they make me think differently when I feel stuck on one way of thinking about a situation or problem - they help me to change my perspective which, for an over-thinker like me, can be massively helpful.
And they're beautiful - every kind of design you could imagine - there's a deck for each unique reader out there. I love the classic Rider-Waite style, and use the Morgan-Greer deck pretty much every day, which is based on the traditional tarot symbolism. But there are some really creative and exciting takes on the tarot out there - if you're interested in Wicca, like me, you might like The Green Witch tarot - a popular deck with a pagan twist. The Wild Unknown and The Bad Bitches Tarot are 2 other decks I have my eyes on at the moment - I can't wait to try them out! I could go on (perhaps this should be the topic for my next blog?) but if you want to waste an hour (or two, or three!) browsing through an astounding array of different styles and artwork, just search 'unusual tarot decks' and you'll be amazed at the variety you can find (for example, I just tested out my own research advice, and in the process stumbled on the Baroque Bohemian Cats’ Tarot - who knew there were cat-themed tarot decks? So when I say there's a deck out there for everyone - I really mean it!)
But getting back to my original point - I've got a lot to say about tarot, as you can tell. A big part of that is because, for a really long time, I was too shy to admit to people that I read tarot and enjoy it. I was so worried about what people would think, that they would think it was stupid, or that I'm some nut that they wouldn't want to associate with anymore! This was mainly down to a few negative experiences I had when admitting my love for tarot to people in my teenage years.
After many years of hiding my secret passion from friends, colleagues - even family, I finally got tired. I was tired of having to try and pretend I don't love something that I actually do love. I was tired of trying to always fit in with what other people thought I should be, like and do. So I decided that I wouldn't hide anymore.
Instead of only reading for a small, close circle of people I trusted, I would start reading for strangers, too.
But that wasn't enough.
So then I thought, well I can start up a Facebook page - I know how to do that (it's not hard) and people use social media all the time - it would be an easy way to put myself out there and see if I could follow through and start giving more and more readings to total strangers.
And something strange started to happen.
Some people thought it was weird, sure. A couple of people kind of sidled away a little bit when I owned up to the truth: I love tarot, and I read tarot, and I even read for other people too!
But no-one was awful. No-one said horrible things. And I didn't suddenly keel over or have my head explode, just from letting out my truth. What I did get some honest, curious questions from friends who wanted to know more - and in the past, they never would have had the chance to ask. Because I was hiding the truth from them all along. Now, I have a chance to share my passion with them - maybe they'll even discover that they love tarot, too.
Even better, a lot of people didn't do any of those things. A lot of people said stuff like "awesome" and "that's so cool." "I didn't know you were into tarot." "Will you read for me, too?"
All of these people, so willing and eager to give their support and cheer me on - and again, I never would have even known that - if I hadn't been brave enough to tell them my truth.
Best of all, this amazing feeling of freedom was suddenly taking over - like a huge weight lifting away from my shoulders. Not having to hide anymore was such a relief - I didn't even realise how much I had been holding back and holding in!
So I took it even further. I built this website, and added real-life pictures of my face (yep, that's me, with the over-fondness for the big chocolate ice-cream!!) because as soon as I started stepping out of my 'closet', I realised how incredibly freeing it could be. And I didn't want to wait any longer to start reaching out to as many people as I possibly can, to share my love of tarot and hopefully help a few people along the way. Giving them a chance to see things from a new perspective, and a fresh way of looking at their challenges - just like the tarot does for me.
And I'd go even further... if you're still how I used to be, keeping your love of tarot a secret - think about 'coming out' too. If it doesn't feel right for you then you'll know - but seriously, give it some thought. Chances are, people won't be anywhere near as judgemental as you're worried they will be.
Chances are, the people who love and care about you, will want to know more about this thing that you're so passionate about - or at least support you in your passion, even if it's not their cup of tea.
Chances are, you'll feel a lot freer and a lot lighter if you can work up the courage to speak your truth, just like I do now.
Chances are, the world needs to see you and your beautiful, unique light shine... not in some approximation of the sort of person you think you should be... but the real, authentic you. That means no more hiding, no more pretending to be someone you're not to make other people feel more comfortable.
Chances are... you didn't find your way here by chance.
So if you ask me, I say: take a deep breath.
And then jump.
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